Starting therapy, how does it work?
From my education and experience I developed a method that is based in gestalt therapy, Internal Family Systems therapy (IFS), polyvagal theory, Safe and Sound Protocol (SSP) and neurobiology. I’d like to explain a bit about this, so that you can have an idea of how I work.
Which form of therapy is right for me?
In the world of psychology, there are many different forms of therapy. Based on the model of Tori Olds I divide them into three categories. Scientific research on the effectiveness of therapy shows us that it’s not important which therapy model is applied, but that there is a sound therapy model. As long as there is a sound theoretical basis, one model isn’t more effective than another. So feel free to focus on what attracts you the most:
Focus on the persons strength and positive affirmation
This form of therapy is primarily focused on what you are good at and where your strengths lie and helps you improve those skills and aspects of yourself. An example is positive psychology or coaching. It helps you to be more independent, use your mindset positively and find joy and pleasure in life.
Focus on learning cognitive and behavioural skills
This form of therapy is primarily focused on learning new thoughts and behaviour. An example is Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) or Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). You will learn new ways of thinking and behaving, with which you can positively influence your life and gain new experiences.
Focus on deep work and holistic theory
This form of therapy is primarily focused on exploring and understanding why you have developed certain patterns and looks at human beings as a whole of collaborating thoughts, feelings and interactions. An example is gestalt therapy or Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP). It will help you find self-compassion and make changes that will go into your core.
My method
My focus is mostly on deep work and I look at the human being and their environment in its entirety. I also use techniques from the other two forms of therapy, we can always discuss practical applications and positive ways of influencing. I lean heavily on the principle that everything that you experience is there for a reason. And if you can discover that reason, you can learn to collaborate with your system in a different way.
To make therapy as effective as possible, I also need your help. I see it as a collaboration where we will explore the best possible way that works for you. I’m always open to feedback and would love to hear how you’re experiencing the sessions. And if it turns out that it doesn’t fit you, I’d be happy to look into other possibilities for you.
How can you get the most out of your therapy?
You have the ability to get as much out of the sessions as you want. Here are a few tips:
- Decide in advance what you would like to work on in the session.
- If you find this difficult, you can try asking yourself these questions: ‘What am I hoping for?’, ‘What would I like to see differently in a few months?’, ‘Which problem is upsetting me the most right now?’ and ‘If everything is possible, what would I do/feel differently tomorrow?’
- Find a way to record what happens during the session. For example by writing during or after the session, by recording it or asking the report from the therapist.
- Try to help yourself remember what you worked on in the days after the session by hanging up a small note or putting a reminder in your phone.
- Give feedback to you therapist about your experience during the session when it feels safe enough to do. This can also be done by mail of phone if that feels better.
You can also look at this clip for more tips in making therapy work effective for you.
How do I know if the therapist is right for me?
You can ask yourself a couple of questions to determine if the therapist is a right fit for you:
- Is this therapist open to options other than the therapy model he/she represents?
- Do you feel comfortable with them?
- Does the therapist seem comfortable with herself/himself and you?
- Do you feel safe enough to collaborate with the therapist?
- Do you feel that the therapist is curious about who you are and what you need?
I invite you to ask these questions about me and would love to hear your findings.
Guaranteeing quality
To guarantee the quality of the therapy, I take a couple of steps. I’m associated with the Nederlands Vlaamse Associatie Gestalttherapie en Gestalttheorie (NVAGT), the European Association for Gestalt Therapy (EAGT) and I am a member of the Register Beroepsbeoefenaren Complementaire Zorg (RBCZ) and the Stichting Complementaire en Alternatieve Gezondeidszorg (SCAG). These associations make sure that I meet their quality control and professional code that I follow.
Besides this I keep on learning to deepen my practice and add new science. From all over the world I can take online courses and I keep educating myself and others in improving our profession. In addition, I regularly do peer review in which I discuss cases. And I simply learn a lot from my clients, every single session.
